Kristina Furey

"A Little More Like Me (The Crucifixion)"--Kenny Rogers

"A Little More Like Me (The Crucifixion)"--Kenny Rogers

She and I met for lunch I could tell from the moment I walked in there was something troubling her.  It entered quickly into our conversation that her son was having bully issues. It was a typical theme in our meetups that her son was ostracized and she was doing her best to help him navigate relationships with his peers.  She and I were both solution seeking individuals, considerate in our brainstorming of each person involved in the situation as we contemplated. I loved her for this!

On this particular occasion, I considered that her son was very much into video, and was perhaps a future director.  I questioned what it might be like if her son was allowed to take his video camera into the school setting and document the life of a fifth grader from his point of view.  My thought being, if he were put in the position where he was doing something uniquely him, while extending the invitation to the other students to be part of this, something special, they would appreciate who he was instead of condemn him for his differences.  Well, it was my assumption it would go that way and the back up plan, idea, was when he was done with his documentary the students would have a front row seat to the production where they would be witnesses to their own treatment of the boy instead of unconscious participators in his torment.  This would provide the school instructors with an opportunity to teach the students to be more considerate of every member in their community. It could also be a tool they could use to help parents have a better understanding of what may be going on and how they can help their children be more conscientious, members of society.  Well, that was my thought anyways…

I am seriously trying to keep what I believe to be a good perspective on people and I am still trying to deal with my own heartache and losses of the past few years. I am trying to stay centered in a very right verses left world. I am trying to so hard to sustain what once was my rosy perspective of life or maybe more so, my belief in the goodness of others. I'm concerned that I am not only losing that but also, my belief in the American Dream. Has it become a nightmare? In an attempt to bravely head in the direction of my fears, I went online last week in search of figuring out where Florida Senator, Marco Rubio, stands on children being separated from their parents due to the Zero Tolerance border policy and I found this video.

At first I found the sound quality to be poor and it was hard enough to hear Marco Rubio's answers and then someone started badgering him. I understand their anger and they have every right to be angry but I think it is time for us to reconsider angers role in a healthy person. Anger should alert us to a felt conflict and that alert feeling should stimulate the brain to find a healthy and viable solution. A viable solution is not to verbally or otherwise attack another person. That is destructive. We want to be constructive! Let the man talk. Let him start the conversation and then respectfully participate in that conversation, if you really want to help. Hey, I am a very sensitive person and I have made the mistake many times in my life of using my anger in a destructive verses constructive way but once I was shown the correct way of utilizing it, I was amazed at the results. Hopefully, this post is telling of its power. Hopefully, it is proof that we can come together to solve our differences, solve mistakes we make along the way and show us the way when are lost. Speaking of lost, I feel very lost on what we are doing to reunite these children with their parents AS QUICKLY AS IS POSSIBLE. The matter of the children's welfare is very important to me! Seems to me bullies in their country created a problem and we in our own country have added to that problem with our own bullying. Bullying is not a solution. It just a pathetic tool, used by those incapable of healthy interactions. It is a sick, sad attempt, at implying significance through force, instead of genuine compliance. It is an inhumane action that started trending on social media and like a decease spread into our homes, communities and our politics. It would do us all some good, if we would take a moment to nip it in the bud! Can we stop being reactive, start editing ourselves and start looking for solutions? I believe we can stop our bully problem, one bully at a time but to do that, first we each need to remove ourselves from the description of the word bully.

Side note: Did you ever see, “Down And Out In Beverly Hills”?  I think that might have been what sparked my idea of a kid running around with a video camera.  I remember it was a great movie and the song that accompanied it, Talking Heads, “Once In A Lifetime”, made for a perfect pairing! Makes a good pairing for this blog too, as does "You Are A Tourist" by Death Cab For Cutie.




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